21 Reasons Why Hillary Clinton Sucks!

June 27, 2007 | by John | Filed Under Politics, People |

The Glacier. Wicked Witch of the West Wing. Hilla the Hun. Robbery Hillham. Slick Hillary. Whatever name she goes by, one thing is for certain: she is a cybernetic organism that has traveled back in time to bring about a socialist paradise for all of mankind.

Hillary Clinton stands at the forefront of a critical period in human history. Evangelical Christians, Zionists and Islamic radicals threaten to take over the world, and there is only one person that can stop them. Will she fulfill her destiny? Or will all of humanity be subjected to bible study every Wednesday night (or madrassas every day)? The polls look promising for Hillary; she might win. But then again, she might not. Unfortunately for us, we lose either way. Why? Because Hillary Clinton sucks.

1. She is not human. She is a machine with no feelings.

2. She hides her past. If something deals with the makeup of a presidential candidate or first lady, maybe it’s something the public has a right to know about. She suppressed her senior thesis when Bill Clinton became president.

3. She’s anti-Semitic. She called Clinton’s former campaign manager a “fucking Jew bastard.” Of course she denies it though. But then her former bodyguard said he heard the Clinton couple use anti-Semitic slurs 10 to 20 times. He asserts that he heard Hillary use the term “Jew bastard” and called President Clinton a “Jew boy” and a “motherfucking Jew.” She also kissed Yasser Arafat’s wife after she claimed that Israel deliberately used poison gas on Palestinians (with no proof).

4. She changed her name for political reasons. Apparently she isn’t willing to stand up for her beliefs.

5. She engages in bribery for financial gain. For some reason, her commodities broker allowed her to place an order for $12,000 worth of cattle futures contracts, even though she only had $1,000 in her account. This violated the Chicago Mercantile Exchange rules governing margin trading.

6. She despises homemakers and women who stay at home to care for their families. She loves to insult this behavior.

7. She is a hypocrite for staying married to Bill Clinton. In a 60 Minutes interview she said, “I’m not sitting here as some little woman ’standing by my man’ like Tammy Wynette.” Actually Hillary, yes, you are, and for your own political gain, too.

8. She is a liar. She claims to have been named after the mountain climber Sir Edmund Hillary. However, he did not become famous until five years after she was born. I guess her parents are clairvoyant.

9. Whitewater. I have no idea how to explain this succinctly. However, the fact that this scandal is so boring and hard to understand is enough to make the list.

10. She murdered Vince Foster. That’s right, I said it. But don’t just take my word for it.

11. She believes she can converse with the dead. She talks to Eleanor Roosevelt.

12. She’s a conspiracy theorist fear-monger. She concocts imaginary theories with which to scare her followers.

13. She stopped supporting the Chicago Cubs for political reasons. She changed her support to the New York Yankees during her senate campaign, even though she had been a lifelong fan of the Cubs.

14. She uses ghostwriters for her books, and then claims the work as her own.

15. As senator of New York, she did not attend any funerals for 9/11 victims (the only major politician not to do so). Her response, of course, was that she did “not believe, after a long lifetime in and around politics, that people should thrust themselves into private grief just because they’re politicians.” Yeah, I believe her.

16. She’s a racist. She insulted Indians by claiming Mahatma Gandhi, “ran a gas station down in Saint Louis.”

17. She’s immune to criticism. Do we ever hear about this stuff in the media anymore? Wonder why? How many of you are actually enjoying this?

18. She adopts fake accents for political reasons. She tries to affect a Southern drawl when speaking to Southerners. She’s from ILLINOIS.

19. She calls young people lazy. Well, maybe she’s right about that one.

20. She has flip-flopped on the war in Iraq. She voted for it, and now she is calling on Congress to repeal authorization for it.

21. Hillary sucks so much, she is a singularity of suck. There are so many reasons why she sucks that they could never all fit into one article. And writing this was like stabbing myself in the face, so I’m including the suffering this caused as a reason for sucking.

Filed Under Politics, People | More articles by John

Comments

42 Responses to “21 Reasons Why Hillary Clinton Sucks!”

Jimmy on June 29th, 2007 at 5:50 am

God I hate hillary.
Just a person on July 2nd, 2007 at 3:36 pm

The ads I see here probaley hate this article?! “Hillary for 2008″
Dave on August 9th, 2007 at 8:40 pm

Hillary will do a great job accelerating us into a deep abyss of financial, political, and civil unrest. People think things are bad now, I really get scared when I think about how bad we’ll be off is she wins.
Rosetta Stone on September 6th, 2007 at 9:58 pm

THE MORNING WILL COME WHEN THE WORLD IS MINE

So, “the real agenda was not improving American public education academically but changing it from a system that taught young Americans basic skills and imparted essential cultural knowledge, to a system of training youngsters to serve the state in whatever capacity the government thought necessary.” The Duke lacrosse team fiasco shows that liberal educators have created a phony cultural paradigm that distorts reality. And, nobody exploits phony paradigms, obfuscates the truth, or games the system like the Clintons: http://theseedsof9-11.com

TOMORROW BELONGS TO ME

Set the Wayback Machine for 23 August 1995: a hot day in the nation’s capitol. But 3000 miles due west on the California Coast, a constellation of events was unfolding that would have a cataclysmic effect. Bill Clinton picked up the telephone. It was his Chief of Staff Leon Panetta, calling from a payphone in Monterey. Bill held the receiver at arms length and gazed at the tasteful floral arrangement that adorned the Oval Office. Leon’s disembodied voice filled the room. What now, asked Hillary. It’s that damn college, mouthed Bill. Hillary nodded; just tell Leon he’ll get whatever he needs. There was, no getting out: http://theseedsof9-11.com

Education, Public Service: great ways to gain consensus and launder money. Until one becomes attuned to the Clinton machine, then even true believers become victims. One notices flight-students, and others who couldn’t fly. GOOGLE: UCSC’s Denise D. Denton & CSUMB’s Paul S. Sanford. Both leaped to their deaths in apparent suicides. Apparently neither left a note. Both educators were at the top of their game, and each, innocently enough, poised to focus national attention on Old Balls’s 17th District. Had they believed in a nation of laws, only to succumb to the law of the jungle: corrupt politicians? For them, there was no way out: http://theseedsof9-11.com
Shawn on December 22nd, 2007 at 8:51 pm

Hillary is a lying bitch and has been since the day her husband took office! Both her and Billy lie so much that no matter what they say I cannot see how a person could believe them! I never voted for her lying husband and I certain am not going to vote for that bitch! Hillary Goddam Clinton is not interested in being president, but Queen of the United States!
Pete on January 5th, 2008 at 12:46 am

You know what sucks? This election cycle.

Do you want…
…a theocon who will insist on forcing rape victims to give birth, roll back the THEORY OF EVOLUTION (which is a theory like gravity is a theory), and believes GOD wants HIM SPECIFICALLY to be president (which is, I believe, in opposition to one of the fundamental concepts of democratic society and the break with England)? Huckabee sucks MAJOR.

…a Mormon - and I am no bigot, but Mormonism is as ridiculous as Scientology and gives all normal religions a bad name when it comes to sheer preposterous wtf-ness - who flip-flopped HUGE on abortion and gun control for political reasons, and apparently tied his dog to a cartop, threw his wife under a bus (?), and - much more importantly - reeks to high heaven of being a filthy, deceitful liar with a disgusting fake smile? Romney sucks HUGE.

… a CLINTON? Are you JOKING? Look, I’d love to have our first woman president, but am I the only one who remembers Whitewater and Blewinsky and impeachment and Vince Foster and so on and so on? Those two are stained. I like Hillary, but the right HATES her GUTS. Of course, she’s a real stalwart for things I strongly support. So actually on this I just have to say that Republicans SUCK. They are, in all seriousness, reactionary, undereducated, closed-minded squares and know nothings. But Hillary only sucks by association with Bill, which isn’t bad. My vote for least suck. Unlike Monica.

… Obama… Oh, man. He’s too skinny. He’s too liberal. He’s too “outsider.” He’s WAY too raw. He’s not electable, in my opinion, and probably never will be. But mostly? He’s totally, completely full of it. Everything he says is a calculated line of crap straight out of John Edwards’ ‘04 playbook, and I hate his smug nonsense. Like he’s going to get such broad bipartisan support that the world will change in magical ways or something, when the reality is he’s a pure-blood leftie. And he stole Iowa from Billary, so now it’s going to be a “Muslim” (he’s not a Muslim) against a theocon, and the bastards will manage to destroy every fundamental right we enjoy as Americans if they get another four years. Eww. So although Obama sucks HARD, it’s actually Democrats who suck the worst by me today, for being simple-minded, idealistic, teeny-bopper, unserious, easily swayed by any 60’s-style trash about change in Washington from any fresh face… it’s hard to explain until you realize what a bunch of effete, upper-crust, no-nothing knobs the Dems in this country are.

So who sucks? Every last one of you, that’s who. I’m holing up until winter.
jane nash on January 6th, 2008 at 7:46 am

Hillary sucks there is no doubt of that but you forgot another raeson she entered NY as a carpet bagger just to get into the politics and calmed she would never run for president ever she just wanted to help the people of new york like we needer her ass to help us and i am ashamed of my fellow new york-ers for voting for her
Sandy on January 6th, 2008 at 3:33 pm

Hillary is a scorp: jealous, vindicative and selfish..please dont vote for her..she’ll use everyone for her own profits..
UnCommon Sense » Blog Archive » Ron Paul’s New Hampshire Debate Highlights on January 6th, 2008 at 7:00 pm

[…] any of these other guys have of getting my vote is either Ron Paul not getting the GOP nod or if Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama are my alternatives. I won’t vote for Democrat unless God himself tells me […]
Nona Maas on January 7th, 2008 at 9:18 pm

Hillary sucks. Period. I am glad she is losing. She is a liar, thief, and has not done jack shit for the residents of NY.

Barack Hussein Obama Bin Laden … LOL
Mitt Romney … LOL
Rudy … LOL
Edwards ???

I hope the American Patriot John McCain can suffer through the primaries and caucuses.

Nona
dave on January 8th, 2008 at 8:47 pm

hilary is going stupid anti-semetic bitch
Guy on January 22nd, 2008 at 5:14 pm

HILLARY BE CRAZY UP BOIIIIII

Ron Paul 2008
go mccain screw every one else on January 27th, 2008 at 9:16 pm

i want to t-bag hilary
i hope romney gets raped by an asian
i would love for obama to get caught with out a green card
huckabees nice, but not a strong leader
Ron Paul’s New Hampshire Debate Highlights « Xanders Place on January 28th, 2008 at 12:51 pm

[…] any of these other guys have of getting my vote is either Ron Paul not getting the GOP nod or if Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama are my alternatives. I won’t vote for a Democrat unless God himself tells me […]
Bradley Wyatt on February 4th, 2008 at 1:04 pm

fuck the police
Drink To The Dead » Blog Archive » Ron Paul’s New Hampshire Debate Highlights on February 5th, 2008 at 8:40 am

[…] any of these other guys have of getting my vote is either Ron Paul not getting the GOP nod or if Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama are my alternatives. I won’t vote for a Democrat unless God himself tells me […]
ashley simpson on February 6th, 2008 at 10:06 pm

Hillary Clinton is going to one day have PMS and press the button that destroys the States. Well, that’s if she’s president.
Hannah Montana on February 6th, 2008 at 10:10 pm

HELLary Clinton. She’s awful.
DA on February 8th, 2008 at 3:33 pm

One word describes Hillary…AMORAL…
starkfist on February 9th, 2008 at 7:23 am

21 reasons and those are the best you can come up with??? How about Waco? How about Oklahoma City? How about the first attempt to bring down the World Trade towers? How about Vince Foster, Ron Brown, Sgt. Brian Haney, Sgt.Tim Sabel, Maj. William Barkley, Capt. Scott Reynolds, Jerry Luther Parks, Ed Willey, Ian Spiro? All of the preceding are the names of people that were involved with the Clintons in some capacity and died under questionable circumstances. Some of them were brutally murdered. All of them had information on Billie Bob and Hillarroid that the gruesome twosome probably did not want to see go public. How about Hubby’s presidency saw the first of the economic bubble scams, the so-called high tech bubble, that left thousands of people ruined while it filled the pockets of a few. Care to guess who’s campaign they helped to finance? Bottom line is that these two are cold ruthless animals who have no intention of looking out for our best interests and that of our country. Let’s face it, Clinton’s 8 years was the dry run for the atocities of the Bush administration. And now they want Hillarroid back in to finish America off. There’s no doubt in my mind that if she get’s in with a Democratic majority in the House and Senate then our guns will gone along with what’s left of the Bill of Rights.
Ricky on February 14th, 2008 at 9:47 pm

Barack Obama: Ruthless politician.
John McCain: Ruthless politician.
Hillary Clinton: Ruthless politician.

They are all bullies. That’s why they’re at the top of the pack. It’s a pretty fierce competition because it’s a game of strategy with one winner. I’d like proof that any of them actually murdered anyone for political purposes, if someone claims that any one of them actually did.
HS on February 17th, 2008 at 1:40 pm

I couldn’t help but crack up laughing when I saw the hillary nutcracker. Be sure to get yours while they are still in stock!
http://www.perpetualkid.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=2358
Why Hillary Even Considered on February 19th, 2008 at 5:25 am

Why would anyone even consider Hillary as a candidate for President let alone vote for her

The “gut” evidence and observation is overwhelming and the lack of physical evidence into Vince Foster’s Murder is a good example of how calculating and schemeing the Clinton’s are.

With all the great Americans my plea to Clinton supporters… find someone else to support who has a shred of integrity and real accomplishment

Prediction: Within a decade futher truth about Clinton’s will come out…
Alicia on February 24th, 2008 at 4:33 am

I’m an independant/conservative. I don’t care for any of the top three candidates because they will do nothing about our borders or the illegals.
So, being an outsider, so-to-speak, I have learned to admire Hillary for her strength. Obama only needs to show up and look good. Hillary has to fight Obama, the media (t.v., radio, newspapers ) Oprah, the Kennedy’s and the black race. I have never seen ANYONE go up against such unbelieveable odds! And ALL of the politicians are crooked as hell, it’s not just the Clintons…so get real people.

She is a fighter! Obama is a Pussy!
Grizz on February 27th, 2008 at 1:40 pm

Hillary is a fighter for Hillary, not are Country
She can stick her head up my ass, and fight for air.

Now ya all know that, the only reason Hillary is running for President, Is so that she can have sex in the White House too!!!!! Come on now really think about it, Bill set there making a Jackass out of himself and Our country, and she didn’t divorce him???
As far as her not being a Cubs Fan any more (Thank You) now i can continue to like my Srubiees.

If ya all remember Desert Storm (yes I was there) Old Bill set there for 8 years afterwards (with Hillary at his side) down sizeing out Military. And then what yea 9/11
No Bill was the pussy and Hillary is the Pussy lover. I believe if Hillary is running our Country, her first move is to downsize where Bill left off. Open are borders to every bleading heart left in the world. And when when something catastropic does happen she won’t do a danm thing about it, but talk. If you think are country is bad now, Just wait.

ANYBODY BUT HILLARY.COM
Chris on March 6th, 2008 at 6:17 pm

Hillary Clinton is so pathetic. When she thought she would run away with the Democratic nomination she was all for not counting Michigan and Florida. Now that she is destined to lose to Obama she is demanded that Michigan and Florida count.

She is pathetic.
Ckay on March 6th, 2008 at 6:59 pm

Alicia says the media is for obama, come on– If Obama lost 12 straight contests and tried to claim victory in a state where he was the only one on the ballot, he would be cooked. They let her decide the story.

Case in Point: The Canada-NAFTA memo, the Canadien government came out and said that the Clinton camp also had a meeting assuring the government that nothing would happen on NAFTA– (Of course, they did, that was her husband’s crowning achievement) Yet, the press and Hillary was all over Obama. SNL puts out racist cartoons days before her campaign. Two of her staffers fired for perpetrating the Muslim rumors.

Why do you think her votes come from: Latinos, women, and uneducated whites. Two of those groups will move to McCain in the General Election.

She is so full of crap, it’s hard to believe anybody believes her. Why does she Cry when politically helpful, act tough when politically helpful, and act gracious when politically helpful– get real people

It’s all a lie, her whole life is a lie. If she steals it from Obama, then I will campaign for McCain at least he stands for something. I am not the only Obama guy who will do this, she has no shot at the election because the only way she can win it, is by changing the rules and stealing it– the outrage will be undeniable. Has she ever congratulated Obama after a win– No– she pretends the states he wins don’t count– what kind of President is that?
Alex on March 6th, 2008 at 8:49 pm

actually…hillary doesnt suck. If she did, then the lewinski thing would have never happened >_>
ashley on March 7th, 2008 at 6:38 pm

HILLARY IS A PEICE OF SHYT!!!!!
HER AND HER FUKKIN GAY ASS HUSBAND CAN GO SUMWHERE!!

OBAMA
OBAMA
OBAMA
OBAMA
OBAMA ROX MY SOCKSZ!!!!!!
BARACK FUKKIN OBAMA FOR 2008!!!!

mike huckabee: sucks dick
john mccain: kiss my ass
hillary clinton: go die
ron paul: go eat grass
BARACK OBAMA: YOUR ASS BETTER WHEN CAUSE YOU HAVE MY VOTE ANY DAMN DAY!!!!
i luv pussy on March 7th, 2008 at 6:50 pm

i would vote for hillary only if she licked my pussy
if she was a lesbian i would tap that ass!!!
bill BACK OFF!!!
I HAD AN AFFAIR WITH YOUR WIFE!!!!
ASK HER ABOUT ECINAHS!!!!!
ASK HER ABOUT ECINAHS ETTENRUB!!!
LOLZ JK JK JK
but yea hillary you would have my voe if you were a lesbian but you are not so i would have to vote for
i luv pussy on March 7th, 2008 at 6:51 pm

i would vote for hillary only if she licked my pussy
if she was a lesbian i would tap that ass!!!
bill BACK OFF!!!
I HAD AN AFFAIR WITH YOUR WIFE!!!!
ASK HER ABOUT ECINAHS!!!!!
ASK HER ABOUT ECINAHS ETTENRUB!!!
LOLZ JK JK JK
but yea hillary you would have my voe if you were a lesbian but you are not so i would have to vote for BRITTNEY SPEARS!!! she may b bald but she sure can lick a nice pussy
rwerytuio on March 20th, 2008 at 6:35 pm

HILARY CLINTON SUCKS BUTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE IS GOING TO KILL ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE UNTED STATES ….. THEN LAUGH ABOUT IT…..SHE IS JUST A BIG PSYCO PATH… AND IF I FIND OUT A SECRET ABOUT HER SHE WILL PROBALBLY HAVE ME KILLED TO….. ALL I ASK IS IF ALL THE CILNTONS JUST PERMANATLY JUST GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
GO OBAMA HE IS THE ONLY HOPE WE HAVE FOR THE FUTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NURSE WRETCHED GO LAURA INGRAHAM SHE THINKS SHE SUCKS TOO
a freak on May 25th, 2008 at 6:33 pm

A vote for Clinton is a one way ticket to living hell.
Ralph DeMattia on May 26th, 2008 at 11:41 pm

It’s nice to see finally, that people are sensing what I’ve been saying since 1991: That Hillary Clinton IS A C**T who would sell her dead mother’s soul to Satan to get into the White House! Who could even THINK of voting for an asshole lke her?
Meghan Dietze on May 29th, 2008 at 7:22 am

If Hillary wins the election, {i doubt she will though} I’m moving to Canada.
Senor Awesome on June 1st, 2008 at 7:24 pm

If you hate Hillary, you may be interested in joining this election day cause described in my blog. Pledge to masturbate thinking about Hillary on election day to help her break the world record! Every jack counts!
Abigail on June 15th, 2008 at 12:59 pm

I cannot stand Hillary. I’m so glad she did not win the nomination. Go McCain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love old ppl!!! lOL!
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Women's rights groups endorse Obama - Page 9 - Debate Politics Forums on September 18th, 2008 at 11:14 am

[…] and Hillary Clinton, seem to think that acting "like a woman" is a sign of being weak. 21 Reasons Why Hillary Clinton Sucks! : Who Sucks Hillary Clinton - Why Women Hate Hillary - The Hillary Project - HillaryProject.com Unlike her […]
Chad on October 8th, 2008 at 8:29 am

John, your a bitch.
Obama sucks way worse then Hillary. At least she’s not a phoney bastard. He’s gonna sit on his ass and not do a thing.
BillGates on October 24th, 2008 at 5:24 pm

I’m go glad that Hillary lost. She Sucks!!!! I’ve supported Obama since day one (February 2007). The World would come to a end if Hillary was elected, Terrorists would attack the US and bomb us.

Obama ‘2012

NO HILLARY or PALIN IN 2012!
John on November 3rd, 2008 at 9:57 pm

I was dissapointed in these comments.
#1 do declare that somone is not human is pretty far out there as well as having no feelings.
#2 I do believe that she was a tough person that had a chip on her shoulder, and did not have an appealing personality, but I do believe that she would have made a great president as is Barrak Obama.